Response to “Woman” TikTok Video

By V.C. Turner

Dear TikTok Woman,

I saw your video on Facebook (via TikTok) and I felt it important to offer my own humble response and opinion. It is a free country after all and I feel certain that patriots like you understand the Bill of Rights… or you claim to know and respect the first two amendments at least.

In your video, you spent about two minutes stating that trans women aren’t really women and that they should stop using the term because it doesn’t apply to them. You talk about how trans women can’t call themselves women because they weren’t born with vaginas, and so on and so forth.

You said you don’t think trans women should be in public bathrooms with your children. Then you go into the fact that being trans is a mental disorder and that it should not be “celebrated.”

Well, Bless your heart. I’m going to pray for you.

Here’s is my take:

You don’t have a monopoly on womanhood.

To be fair, I don’t think YOU represent ME as a woman. I’m a woman, and what makes me a woman is more than just two X chromosomes and being born with a vagina. Real women already know that. My identity isn’t defined simply by the genetic and physical traits expressed at my birth. My womanhood is more all-encompassing than that.

Again… real women know this.

I don’t fear trans women in bathrooms with my children. I never have. Trans people are not violent. In fact, they are more likely to be the victims of violence. Most crimes of molestation are committed by …. *Checks notes* …. Cis Straight Men. However, based on your video, I suppose you would be more comfortable with Larry Nassar being your daughter’s physician, than a trans woman going into a public bathroom.

The reality is that straight sexual predators are calling themselves teachers and seducing your underage children. Straight men are the ones putting cameras into public bathrooms to look up women’s skirts. Straight men are the ones buying guns and shooting up the schools and churches your children attend. Straight men are beating and killing the women they allegedly love. Priests have been found guilty of abusing children for decades…

Meanwhile, you are afraid of someone who identifies as a trans woman urinating in a closed stall next to you? Seriously?

Being trans isn’t a mental illness or a disorder. The term Gender Dysphoria “describes a sense of unease that a person may have because of a mismatch between their biological sex and their gender identity. This sense of unease or dissatisfaction may be so intense it can lead to depression and anxiety and have a harmful impact on daily life,” (source: NHS).

This sense of unease, anxiety and depression is caused by people like you – who don’t accept trans women and men as God’s children. You mistreat them. You judge them. You discriminate against them. You try to shame them.

You can rattle off fake statistics and studies all you want, but the truth of the matter is that people who are part of the LGBTQ community die by suicide more frequently than the rest of us because of people like you. They are more likely to be the victims of violence – because of people like you. They are more likely to be discriminated against – because of people like you. You are the dangerous person in this equation.

You are the person that my children should fear: a person that walks up to them with a smile on their face and a black heart beating in their chest.

I don’t fear trans people.

You know who I do fear: People like you. People who wrap themselves in the cloak of Christianity while they spew hate at people who are different than they are. People who use God and the Bible to justify their homophobia, transphobia, racism, and any other hate they hold in their hearts.

That’s the thing: God sees all. He sees into your heart. Going to church doesn’t make you a true Christian. Wearing a crucifix around your neck isn’t what makes you holy. Reciting Bible verses to back up your hate-filled messages isn’t going to get you into heaven any faster than anyone else.

God doesn’t care about the building in which you sit.

God cares what is in your heart.

What’s in your heart? How are you using his name? Are you using it to judge? Are you using it to spew hate toward other people? Are you using His name to justify violence toward others?

God knows your heart and so does anyone who watched your video.

I consider myself a Christian. Granted, I’m not the best Christian in the world. I have faults. I have flaws. I’m working on them. I pray about it.

What makes it hard for true Christians is people that post hate, homophobia, and transphobia all while portraying themselves as a Christian.

Now, the mother in me is telling you that you can come for me all you want. You can say whatever you want about my blog, about me, how I look, my race…. Go for it. Hate speech isn’t protected by the first amendment, but I don’t care what you say or post about me. I’ll be fine.

But with this video – you came for my child!

That’s right. My oldest child is a trans woman. I’m going to be honest with you; this has been difficult because what I’m worried about is that she will see this video or another one like it, and she will feel hurt, and anxious, and ashamed. Most of all, she won’t feel valid and I don’t want her going through that, but I can’t shield my children from the world – no matter how much I try to do so.

I can love them. I can protect them. I can pray for them.

In 2019, my 21-year-old came out as trans. Honestly: I was shocked. I was confused. I was scared. The one thing I wasn’t, however, was judgmental. I held her and said I would take this journey with her. I’m supporting my kid because that’s what parents do. I’m being strong for her because that’s what mother’s do. I’m helping her with the transition from male to female and teaching her about womanhood and life because that’s what a real woman does. That’s what a real Christian does, in my opinion.

You are welcome to believe and practice whatever you choose. That is your right. Do whatever you want, say whatever you want – it doesn’t bother me. But you don’t come for my kids. My children are sacred and I will defend them with all the breath that God has given me.

All I can do is pray that one day, when you get down on your knees, instead of talking at God – you listen TO God. You wait for him to enter into your heart. You wait for him to speak to you. Feel his spirit deep inside you.

Do you really believe that He’s going to tell you to hate someone else? Do you really believe he doesn’t want you to love your neighbor and pray for them? Do you really think that you could give your TikTok diatribe in front of God and he’s going to approve?

Maybe you do.

If so … I’m going to pray for you.